We had recently moved into our new home but still had a
few things left to be done, one of those being to finish painting the basement
floor. It was late morning mid-week when
my husband decided to go purchase the paint needed to complete the job.
Circling the store he saw a space by the back fence of
Sears, which was ideal and close to the department where he needed to get
supplies. With the truck blinker on
hubby began pulling into a parking space, when without notice a car came
ripping across the lot and pulled into the spot.
Jamming on the brakes he did a hard turn of the wheel to
avoid crashing into the “space thief’s” vehicle, and barely missed hitting
another car that was driving by at the time.
The spirit of offense had hit the pavement.
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A Loose Wing-nut
Moving on to another open space my husband parked the vehicle and started to
walk toward the store. As he approached
the gate he saw the man who stole his spot waiting for him. The “wing-nut” as he put it, was running his
mouth spouting gibberish, getting louder and faster in what he was saying.
The stranger’s whole demeanor just flipped his
switch. What you don’t know is that my
husband was already on edge having lost a high paying job two days prior to
this incident due to downsizing. His
emotions were on overload, so it didn’t take much to ruffle his
feathers.
It was obvious that the dude was looking for a
fight. Unfortunately, this man didn’t
know hubby switched into “street” mode.
Not wanting to deny the stranger’s heart desire, without a word my
husband grabbed the shoulder of the offender’s jacket. Rearing back to nail him, he was about to
make this chap a permanent part of the fence.
The Point of Offense
With his fist in the air ready to “let ‘er fly” another
driver, who had witnessed the whole pathetic thing, looked at my husband and
said, “Do you really want to do that?” Now if you know hubby you already know what
was floating around his brain.
“Yeah, I sure do and I think I’m going to enjoy this”.
He would have to, but that day the man found the grace
and mercy of God through the voice of
reason which caused him to back off and calm down.
As the three men stood there hubby released his grip with
a little force, causing the man to step back a few steps. Here’s where you realize sometimes stupid is
just stupid, and once again the culprit’s mouth went into high gear rattling
off things you can’t repeat.
My husband and the witness let the offender walk in front
of them. You would have thought that guy
learned his lesson, but he didn’t. They
continued walking toward the store entrance with this “mouthpiece” chirping all
the way.
Hubby was trying to remain calm when the third driver
(you know, the voice of reason) stopped and shouted, “Why don’t you just shut up?!!!
Evidently he too had reached that point of offense.
Nodding at one another with unbelief over what took
place, my husband and “Mr. Reason” stopped in their tracks regaining their
composure as they watched the offender walk into the store still arguing under
his breath.
The
Sinner’s Grudge
My
journey for this blog post began before Christmas of 2016 when a
friend of mine sent me her book to read.
It's threaded with fibers of guilt, hatred, remorse, anger,
bitterness and resentfulness.
Thin
strands of gold reflected the author’s love for her family and the desire to
forgive as God has commanded.
Unfortunately, her peace remained buried because of what was harbored in
her heart for decades.
Affectionately
known as Maggs, she shares how her Aunt refers to these undesirable emotions as
a sinner’s grudge, knowing completely in her heart that is wrong. Her story
kindled an episode that happened in my own life back in 2002 and sparked
something in hubby as well.
The
opening story really happened almost twenty-two years ago to my husband, but it
wasn’t until Wednesday morning of this week (February 8th, 2017)
that I had ever heard it. He had hidden
this event inside his heart for some reason, but the Holy Spirit brought it to his
attention when we began to discuss this week’s subject on “harboring un-forgiveness”.
Whether
we realize it or not sometimes we hold onto or carry unwanted anger, resentment, pain and bitterness. When we do it
becomes rooted in us forming as Aunt Lucy would say, “sinners grudges” which
prevent God from releasing His promised favor on a situation.
That Yellow Sports Car
When we began prodding his memory bank over something
that happened so many years ago, my husband said that he didn’t have any ill
feelings towards the man and frankly never thought of him again until this
week. So when I asked him if he felt
that an offense was committed against him he said, “Yes.”
I suggested in my ever so authoritative counseling voice, “I don’t think this is a coincidence,
because of how you handle situations having to do with drivers.”
The day before we were out running errands around town;
we needed to get back home as soon as possible so we were watching the time. While driving through a large parking lot to
get to the other side of the shopping area, he verbalized his feelings about a
yellow sports car that was parked on an angle taking up two spaces.
Whether a vehicle is too close to a line, someone who
cuts him off to take his space or a car parked unconventionally, hubby becomes
“offended” by it even though he hasn’t met the individual.
Can you see a pattern building? Based on something that happens in our past
that we might not have shared with anyone, we may still hold a little resentment
concerning certain incidents.
An Act of Mercy
He didn’t want to fess up back then but said that the episode
really frazzled him, especially when he noticed how he reacted in anger as a
believer. Hubby shared with me that he
felt ashamed and guilty about his behavior for a long period of time. It took a while before my husband brought the
incident into the throne room of God where he asked for mercy (favor) in being
forgiven.
Newly learning this information, I realized why he hadn’t
told me about the situation. Hubby had
truly forgiven the man and in doing so totally forgot about it. I believe that God brought it to his memory
to share with others who are still dealing with the spirit of offense, by
holding a sinners grudge against another individual.
The
Offensive Seed
Now
don’t feel bad for my husband over me sharing this story, because he is the one
who typed it for me to use (with a little “Fay” pizazz tweaked in of
course). I’ll share my story next week
so you’ll have to come back to read it!
The
point is, throughout our lives we all form a habit of blaming others because we
were born with a sin nature seed courtesy of Adam and Eve. When a behavior goes against our earthly
“nature” or “grain”, we automatically internalize it and the matter goes
unresolved (sometimes for years or a lifetime).
Rather
than deal with painful issues, we find ways to blame someone else. We process
the “incident(s)” as being “offended” then quickly store it away with a
gigantic big lock on a vault somewhere inside our memory bank. I’ve talked about this in the past where we learned
to play the Blame Game.
Looking
at every instance where casting blame has taken place the commonality is that
it doesn’t unite but divides, it tears down and destroys. It complicates
matters rather than solves problems.
In
Romans 5:12a scripture tells us that through one man sin entered into the
world.
“Therefore, just as through one man sin entered the world
…”
The
seed of blame was planted and has multiplied throughout all time. Sadly in many cases what starts out as blame
turns people from being the offended into becoming the offenders.
The
Nature of God
When
we let the spirit of offense rule over our thinking, emotions and behavior whether
in our conscious or sub-conscious, it ceases to be an earthly problem and
becomes a spiritual one.
There
are many Christians who feel that God isn’t listening to their prayers anymore,
and that they’re getting nowhere with Him.
“Will the Lord always reject us?
Will He never
again be pleased with us?”
(Psalm 77:7 GNT)
In
their hearts they feel that God has rejected them and His favor is no longer
available.
“Will the Lord reject forever and never again show
favor?”
(Psalm 77:7 HCSB)
If
the spirit of offense is lingering then they’re probably right, because
anything that goes against the nature of God cannot be processed through
Heaven.
It
is God’s nature to forgive, and when we keep offense alive it literally drives
a wedge between our Creator and mankind. The gap that Jesus filled between God
and man when He died on the cross has been broken wide open again, and the
favor we’ve experienced in the past ceases because our fellowship and
relationship with God has been compromised by sin.
If
we are to move forward in the spiritual vision God has for us we have to deal
with things that are holding us back in the old man nature. What exactly causes us to become ticked off
when certain things happen? Why does it
offend us so much?
Finally,
can we trust God enough to let His nature of forgiveness be manifested in us
regardless of the circumstances? Sooner or
later we’ll have to come to terms with what has happened, and in turn hopefully
we’ll choose to forgive.
This Week’s Challenge:
Removing Seeds of Offense
Our
task this week may be difficult for some, because it involves mental digging …
that means hard work in soil we’d just as soon leave unturned.
God
wants to take us to the next level of favor for our journey, but in order to do
that we have to take His course on forgiving and pass with flying
colors.
“Forgiveness 101 is not an elective course
in the school of Christian Life; it’s a required
subject.”
Charles Swindoll
The
challenge requires that we enter into prayer with humility and a heart that
seeks forgiveness – that of receiving and giving. The Bible assures us that God does hear and
will answer the prayer of repentance.
In
prayer we’ll ask Him to help us uncover, dig up and reveal the hidden offenses
that we have harbored in our spirit. Perhaps
it has to do with a co-worker, a family member, some event from the past, or
even a total stranger like in my husband’s case. Until we’ve identified the offense(s) we
won’t be able to uproot them from our hearts.
Repent
that this unlovely sinner’s grudge seed has been given the power to grow
through undiagnosed hurts. Release the
offender and forgive just as Christ has forgiven all our offenses against Him.
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one
another,
even as God in Christ forgave you.”
(Ephesians 4:32 NKJV)
Continue
memorizing your scripture cards adding this verse to the packet, and
prayerfully make this petition before the Lord.
“I entreated Your favor with my whole heart;
Be merciful to me according to Your word.”
Be merciful to me according to Your word.”
(Psalm 119:58 NJV)
My
husband shared something with us that he’d rather have kept secret. God revealed it for a lesson toward our good
… because …
“If the heart truly forgives, there is nothing to
forget.”
Margaret McBride - Author
All
offense is a seed of un-forgiveness that will delay or destroy the favor God has
ordained to be placed into your life.
Get rid of it today, right now ... so that God's favor,
grace and mercy will be restored in abundance to you.
Forgiveness
by Matthew West
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post.
Until next time, plant
forgives and favor will grow!
“Where there is forgiveness, there is favor.”
Jesus Christ
*Unless
noted, the names in articles are changed to protect the individual(s) privacy.
Note: Emphasis
is given in some scriptures to show clarity or understanding and is not to take
away from the inspirited Word of God.
When used,
the words satan or devil are not capitalized deliberately, because we give him
no place in our lives.
Disclaimer:
Article information is not meant to be used as treatment for mental or physical
issues, but geared toward spiritual awareness.
Rescuing
Your Heart from Resentment and Regret
by
Sara Horn
Available
in paperback or eBook format
Maybe you
don’t know the Living God that I know, but would like to have this kind of
favor in your life also. Click on the
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Content
and Image Copyright from Favored1. Do not copy.
Scripture
references are from the New King James Bible Version or as noted provided by Gateway Bible.
Image
credit: Google Images or Dreamstime
Creative Common License if not specified.
Image: Painting Basement Concrete Floor Proverbs 12:1 "stupid" Holding a Grudge Psalm 40:11 Blame Game Sign
Disclaimer Notes: Results may vary due
to lack of belief.
Author
Margaret McBride; That Melvin Bray p. 273.
The Sinner’s Grudge, Weekly Challenge, Daily Favor Blog, Daily Favor Prayer, Favored1, Favor of God, Forgiveness, Deserting Offense, How to Deal with Offense, Blame Game, Mercy, Repent, Sara Horn, Matthew West, Charles Swindoll.
